It is Monday 23/11/2020 and I spent this weekend just past with my family up in the cold North of England, not far from where we live. It has been a slow weekend as I knew that energetically and behind the scenes, it has been anything but, so we wandered up to the hills of Co Durham for a walk up to High force waterfalls. It was a last minute plan that involved a camping stove, bag full of blankets and enough food to feed the county in a cooler box but we managed to get up there for just past 2pm and to get to the top of the force was a steep and narrow 2.5 mile walk from where we parked. Now that doesn’t seem much but, when you’re marching 2 young kids and a dog up there and the sun is clearly setting, knowing you’ve got it all on the way back down in the dark makes it not the easiest of treks we’ve chosen to do in our time.
But those are the treks that are worth it!
All the way up I kept thinking about all of us. Countries full of people all over the world, getting on with their lives in the now, some struggling more than others, some more consciously aware than others to what is really going on. But nonetheless, all of us, in it together!
I tend to feel the energies of the collective through meditation and I can channel in to what the ‘feel’ is on a regular basis and recently, I have been feeling that people are tired. That they have just had enough and are coming to a ‘wall’ with a lot of stuff. As I was thinking about my part in all of this, it occurred to me in August and was confirmed to me in late October that my role specifically is to work as an Antenna of light and to hold it for as many of you as possible so that if you feel lost, misguided or are in a dark place, hopefully I can help shine on whatever is your low. To be honest, I have been doing this my entire life and my energy is always of optimism, courage, strength and determination but even I get tired. I was tired when we started off this walk but the more I journeyed on, the more strenght I found and mine comes through in particular when I think of us all. When I see us all as one, I feel like a warrior and I find the drive to soldier on… for us all. If it wasn’t for all of us, I wouldn’t care so much I don’t suppose.
I got to the top of this waterfall and I stood for a moment, and with every conscious element in my being, I gathered all of our fear, hatred, torture, pain, anger, loss, hurt and I sent it into the churn of the water and let it flow out. Then I stood and looked at the setting sun and I held my light as fiercely as I could for all of us.
The cloud of human consciousness is rising and releasing density and thickness that for many of us light holders that can see this energetic work, is great but it has been and no doubt will continue to be exhausting. As more and more people release their density and the light switches on, this can only mean that they are facing their shadows.
WHAT DOES THIS MEAN?
Sometimes and often, we have to hit rock bottom and face our darkness in order for the light to shine through. This means that for many of us, we have to do our shadow work and acknowledge the parts of us that normally we keep hidden, out of sight, out of mind. We keep them there for a reason as life is far more comfortable when they are out of the way and we can just go along as peacefully as possible, with them blissfully stored in our subconscious. The problem is though, while they might be hidden, sometimes so deeply we don’t even remember we put them there, it doesn’t mean that they don’t exist or that they aren’t a part of us and sometimes, they rear their head without us asking them to. Why? Because we need to release them. Scary huh!
Our deepest, darkest secrets can be terrifying. They may not even be from this lifetime so it can be near impossible for us species with amnesia to know how to process these shadows and face up to them in order to heal. But we must try.
Last week, A Reiki master I know asked the question ‘What does Courage mean to you?’ – The comments back were varied and many. All of them different. All of them right. I then received an audio of a drum Reiki session with the message:
Enjoy. I recommend using earphones or headphones, sitting down outside on the grass (I recommend finding a tree to rest your back on), closing your eyes, breathe, & and then just let the beats take you away.
I will post the audio at the bottom of this post and please feel free to listen and comment but in the essence and continuation of focusing on courage, I continue..
Courage, right now, is sitting quietly with yourself and going so deeply within you get so entangled in those shadows that you can grab them by the roots and start to pull them out. Courage is facing them once you have pulled them out. Have a conversation with them. Have a conversation with yourself and once you are ready, cut ties with them and release them. Tell them that they are not allowed to go back from where you pulled them from and that you wish to be free from them. And once you have done this, send them to the central sun and to source and source will hold on to them for you. Then you can be free of them and once you are, even though the remnants and the issues they were hidden there in the first place don’t go away, but they have been recognized and addressed, processed so that they don’t need to still be stored within you. Almost like that drawer in the house that all of us have that is filled with stuff. Just stuff, that you mindlessly threw in there because you weren’t sure where else to throw it and then after however many years, you need to clean it out and when you do, it can cause heartache because you come across parts of you that you had forgotten. Old photographs, receipts, letters, pieces of our past that to no one else would make sense but to us they literally hold moments of our lives so triggering and raw that only we can recognize. They may bring back hurt, resentment, anger, misunderstanding and wounds that you had long forgotten but you hadn’t really put closure on or you hadn’t considered the very consequences and depth of until right now in this moment that you’re stood staring back in to that void again and you could either shove it back in the drawer, consciously knowing that you’re hiding it again or you can consciously face it and with COURAGE, process the energy of it and let it go!
I have been working a lot since June 2020 on ‘becoming’ light. I know that my body has changed. I have spoken about this in previous posts but since June and especially now working up to December solstice, I am focusing solely on holding the light that I have become, for each and every person, in the hope that it can help others to awaken to the new consciousness and become the light themselves. In order to do that however, there is work to do.
My message for you right now is, to find the courage to release your inner pain. To be brave enough to get uncomfortable in order to process trauma and hurt so that you can release it and let the light in. Easier said than done, I know, but it is time to let go!
I LOVE YOU ALL